Red Snow
by darksideofnight
Summary: Had he done something terrible, unforgivable, to deserve this treatment from the guardians? He didn't think so...but how would he know?
1. Chapter 1

Jack sighed. Being alone could just be so…_lonely. _What was it the bunny had just told him? Right…_"No one wants you, no one believes in you. All you're good for is annoying people." _ He's just mocked him in return, like always, but, he spoke the truth, didn't he? The white haired spirit lay back on the roof he occupied, hooking his heels over the top so he didn't fall down the slanted surface. His blue eyes narrowed at the full sight of the moon this provided him with.

"Who made you god? Who made it okay for you to create things just to watch them suffer?" As usual, the moon did not reply. His thoughts turned once more to Bunny's words. _No one wants you. _"Am I really that bad?" This question too, went unanswered, and Jack couldn't help the half frozen tears in his eyes. Had he done something terrible, unforgivable, to the other immortals to deserve this treatment? He didn't think so…but how would he know? He knew next to nothing about behaving and communicating with others…but how could he learn if everyone ignored him or yelled at him? He glanced up at his bare feet, shifting his staff so that it could be held comfortably in both hands. It was a slow movement, at first. Just his right foot unhooking from the top of the roof, followed slowly by the left. The quickest part was when accumulated ice slid him down the shingles. It was a small house, really. Just one story, so it was only a split second before his head crashed into the pavement below. Blood gushed, staining the snow, and mixing with the frost, so that red spider web like patterns crossed his pale face as he lay bleeding. But he was immortal. So he was still alive. Even an immortal like him was hurt after the fall, though, and his blue eyes slid shut as his ragged breathing faded from his own ears.

When he did awake, it was two days later. He stood slowly, but upon seeing his reflection in a patch of ice, jumped in surprise. Brown dried blood was crusted into his white hair, dark circles enveloped his eyes, and red frost still crept up his cheeks, standing out because of his pale skin. It was the only time he was ever glad that children could not see him. He was certain they would be scared of a boy who looked like a walking corpse.


	2. Chapter 2

Jack quickly washed the blood out of his hair. If he took too long, the lake would freeze on his head. The lake at Burgess was deafeningly silent. His injury had healed itself quickly, but flakes of blood still stuck to his clothes and hands.

Now that he'd tried to die, he felt worse. Waking up alone on a bloody street had just reminded him how _alone _he was. As he was musing, two kids walked up to the lake, sitting on a stump. One looked to be about ten, while the other looked older. Maybe thirteen?

"Sarah, I miss her." The younger girl's voice shook with sorrow.

"I know, Lizzy. I do, too. She was my best friend, remember?"

"Yeah." This prompted Jack's curiosity. Abandoning his attempts at washing his hair, he floated closer. What had happened to their friend?

"I hate winter. I wish it was warm all the time. Then she wouldn't have died. No one would have to die in the cold." The truth dawned on Jack at the younger one's words, and her tears. Tears formed in his own eyes, as well, but only blocked his vision as they froze.

"It'll be okay, Lizzy. Someday we'll see her again." Sarah didn't look as if she thought it would be okay, though. Jack had to choke back a sob as he backed away from the pair.

He could deal with loneliness…but now he knew. He wasn't only _alone_. He killed. He dropped to his knees, sobs wracking his frame. When would the end come? He couldn't die, and worse, he couldn't stop people from dying. Even in his own domain. He was useless. He was _worse_ than useless. No wonder the guardians hated him. He curled into a ball, snow covering him as he lay unmoving in a drift. _How _could he continue? _How, _and _why,_ and _when?_


	3. Chapter 3

Jack gazed morosely out the window at Santoff Claussen. He'd come to occupy the space quite often since Sandy's death. It had only been about a month since they'd defeated Pitch, though, and Jack wasn't sure he fit in with the guardians at all.

He silently inspected the scar marring the skin on his wrist. It was the only scar that'd never faded. He didn't know why, and he tried not to think about it too much. When you had a past like his, you preferred to leave it behind you. But the scar was the reason he didn't belong. How could he properly help children have fun, if he couldn't even help himself?

He wasn't sure, but the doubt sparked determination in him, as it always had. If children didn't believe in him, he's try everything until they did. Likewise, if he thought he couldn't guard children well, he'd just have to prove himself wrong. Then perhaps the scar would fade. He hoped so. He didn't like it, it reminded him too much of pain.

A/N: Sorry if it was vague in the last chapters, but the previous 2 have taken place before the movie, while this chapter (and all the ones following) take place after. Sorry if this story takes a turn for the sappy in later chapters, but I'm stuck on how to end this, as I intended it to be a one-shot from the start. So, I'll work on that, and if you have any writing advice, constructive criticism is very welcome!


	4. Chapter 4

Jamie laughed as a snowball hit him in the back of the head. Already knowing who it was, he spun around to return fire, only to find Jack, Cupcake, and the rest of his friends all preparing to throw their snowballs at him. Giggling uncontrollably, the group ran around throwing snowballs, with endless and ammo and endless energy.

This was what Jack loved doing, playing in the snow with Jamie and his friends, and the kids knew it. It made them all smile to know the guardian of fun was having fun himself.

Their snowball fight went on a while, until they started building snowmen and making snow angels. The winter spirit darted by Jamie's lumpy creation, tapping it lightly with the end of his staff so that the lumps smoothed out and it was perfectly round.

"Jack, that's cheating!" He tried very hard to sound disapproving, but couldn't keep the laughter from his voice.

After a few hours, Jack knew all too well that it was time for them to go inside to the warm.

"Guys, I'll see you tomorrow, okay? It's time to go inside!" He called towards the other kids as he began to walk Jamie and Sophie (the youngest) back to their house.

"Yeah, Jack! See ya'"

"I hope there's another snow day!"

The departing trio walked quietly for a moment, when Sophie suddenly slipped on a patch of ice, yelping loudly even when Jack caught her and steadied her again. She held his arm tightly as she crossed another patch of ice, and, as she lost her footing again, accidentally pushed up his sleeve.

"Jaaaack! Is that a birth mark? It's pretty funny looking!" The blonde girl looked up at him in confusion.

"Whattarya talking about, Soph?" Jamie, too, grabbed the sprite's wrist before he had a chance to react.

"She's right, Jack. You sure that's a birth mark? Looks more like a shark bite to me…did you fight a shark_?_!" At first the brunette had looked quizzical, then excited as he pictured the guardian fighting a shark. Jack chuckled nervously, pulling down his sleeve again.

"Uh, actually, yeah…it is a birth mark…pretty weird, huh?" The siblings gave him a strange look at the strange strained expression on his face, and as they entered the yard, Jack abruptly took off into the sky, shouting 'see you guys later!' before disappearing from sight. Jamie thought it was strange, but he decided that since Bunny had agreed to read them a story before bed tonight (though only because of Sophie's begging,) he could ask him if he knew anything about how strange Jack had acted.

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"…And that's how the gold shoed Easter bunny gave the sick little boy a happy Easter. The end." Bunny closed the book (which he had only read because of the Easter theme,) and hopped over to bid the two siblings good night.

"Hey, Bunny! I just remembered!" Jamie started, bouncingly slightly on the bed he occupied. "Today we found out Jack has this really weird birth mark on the inside of his wrist. He acted really weird about it…and don't tell him I said this, but that thing didn't look like a birth mark. I think he must have gotten in a fight with a dinosaur!"

"Raar!" Sophie jumped up and down as well, but Bunny's frown just grew deeper.

"The inside of his wrist, you said?" He tapped a foot nervously.

"Yeah, but I guess that is a weird spot for the dinosaur to attack…" Jamie frowned as well. But Bunny was pacing, now. _Bloody hell, Frostbite. I hope this isn't what I think it is…_

"Sorry, kids, but I've got to go now. I promise I'll visit before the Easter rush, though, alright?" Without waiting for an answer, he thumped the ground and dropped down the hole he'd created.

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Jack nearly jumped out of his skin when he saw Bunny marching angrily across the frozen lake that served as his home. He scrambled to his feet, tucking his arms behind his back nervously and clutching his staff.

"W-what's up, Bunny?" The pooka finally reached his spot in the middle of the lake, and glared at him.

"Your wrist, Frostbite. Show it to me." The winter spirit's eyes widened and he froze completely still before finally replying:

"I…I don't know what you mean, Bunny." He leaned back nervously at the angry look on the other guardian's face, all the while tucking his wrists behind his back, and holding his staff at the same time.

"Oh, I think you know exactly what I mean." Without another moment's hesitation, Jack jumped into the sky, leaving an extremely angry Bunny back on the ice. It wasn't a good solution to the problem, and he knew it, but that didn't matter to him. All he could do was run.

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"Sandy! C'mere! It's bloody important!" Sandy, who had been conducting a symphony of elf bells, paused his masterpiece long enough to allow Bunny to whisper an explanation in his ear:

"Sorry mate, but Jack's gone a little wacky…I asked to see his wrist, and he ran off somewhere. Ya gotta help me find him. I didn't wanna tell North and Tooth til after we find him 'cause they'll freak." A gold question mark appeared above the dream master's head, in response to which Bunny made a silent stabbing gesture at his own wrist. The question mark disappeared, and was replaced by an exclamation point, Sandy's expression hardened.

"Let's go, mate." The duo took off in search of the fifth guardian, knowing it was imperative that they find him quickly.

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Jack was leaning on a peak high in the Himalayas, trying desperately to reason his way out of the situation. Where was the answer? The escape route? He couldn't see one…running had given Bunny all the confirmation he needed, the only option he could consider was to run forever. But he could do that, couldn't he? He had 300 years of practice, after all. Yes, he decided, he could manage. It was only after he'd decided this that he must've nodded off, because next thing he knew, he was being yanked into the sky by a golden sand rope.

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Sandy sensed it immediately the moment Jack fell asleep. He formed his golden airplane and took off towards the Himalayas, with Bunny following far below on the ground.

Eventually, they arrived at the mountain range, meeting up a little ways below the peak Sandy knew Jack rested on.

"Just grab him, mate. I think it might be better to take him to North's first. He seemed a little out of it." Sandy frowned, but decided that the guardian of hope was probably correct. So, he flew up high on his cloud and sent down a stream of sand to pick him up, preparing for what he planned to be a gentle and smooth ride, however, Jack was not going to come quietly.

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Jack pulled and struggled anyway he could at the golden bonds. Going so far as to freeze a large section of the rope, only to have it catch him again. He pulled with all his might, but was knocked out by another stream, forcing his body limp for the rest of the trek to the cloud.

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The next time he woke up, he was seated in a chair in Santoff Claussen, staring at four faces all filled to bursting with a medley of concern, sorrow, and general upset.

A/N: This was soo long… sorry for the short paragraphs…I think the trouble is that I write almost all my stuff out on paper first, so it looks really long…and then it's really not. At all. As always, review if you've got time! Thanks!


	5. Chapter 5

Bunny silently gazed at the winter spirit while they waited for him to wake up. He didn't like this silence one bit. It was like they were staring at a corpse, pale and cold. The comparison hit a little too close to home for Bunny to be comfortable with it.

"What are we supposed to say to him?" Tooth was visibly upset, her usual chatters to the mini fairies absent, along with her usual smile. No one in the room knew how to answer her question. What did you say to someone who attempted suicide? Bunny shuffled his feet, and everyone remained silent. Guilt gnawed at their hearts. When had it happened? And why? There were many questions they wanted to ask, and they weren't sure exactly how to ask them. But the scariest question of all to them, was: how many times?

When Jack awoke, it was suddenly, he stood facing them, his blue eyes wide with an expression that made them wince: fear. There was a long moment where all five of them just stood and watched each other, the tension in the air was suffocating. North took a deep breath and spoke, keeping his tone calm.

"Jack, are you feeling alright?" The guardian in question bit his lip; tears grew in his eyes, but froze before they could fall, so they obscured his vision. He took a faltering step back, and shook his head, silently wishing he could just run away like before. Somewhere along the way, his habit of just swallowing his feelings and smiling had failed him. Sandy floated forward, intending to comfort him, but Jack only stepped back further.

"Will you tell us what happened?" Tooth's voice was not calm as North's had been, but shook with guilt and sadness. This only made Jack feel worse. He swallowed, finally calming enough to step back to his original position. His face was a mask, and all that shown on the other four's faces were sadness and concern. It was a depressing atmosphere, to say the least.

"It was a long time ago. I don't see why it matters now. I haven't done anything like that for one hundred years. And I'm alive. So why does it upset you all so much?" Bunny, despite the pain they faced, sputtered indignantly.

"What do ya mean you don't know why it matters? Of course it matters! That's why we're doing this!" North frowned slightly at Bunny, wishing he wouldn't burst out like that at this fragile moment.

"What Bunny is trying to say is, if it is still bothering you, then it is problem. But, if you've moved on, it is not problem. You don't have to tell us what happened; just tell us if you need our help." Bunny, Tooth, and Sandy all nodded. Jack clenched his fists at his sides. He couldn't explain his anger, but he felt resentment bubble up inside him, and he spoke with it.

"Help me how? How can you even justify saying that? I've known you for maybe a month and a half, and you just think that suddenly you can help me and fix everything? You decided to wait this long to decide to care how I felt and what happened to me?" Jack regretted his words, as soon as he spoke them. Bunny, usually conceited and offensive, was quiet and sorrowful. Tooth had tears on her cheeks, North's usually bright eyes had dimmed and he looked away, while Sandy stood on the ground, staring at his golden toes solemnly. The anger leaked out of him, leaving a desolate and regretful landscape of emotion.

"There is no justification. I wish I had something to say that could explain why we left you alone that long. But there's not. All there is is arrogance and prejudice. I'm sorry, Jack. I wish there was something I could do to change it, but there isn't. We all wish there was some justification. But the only thing we can do is try to make it up to you now." Tooth's voice quivered, but she spoke with a resoluteness that only came with complete certainty. "We knew that before. But this is scary to me…to us. We don't want you to get hurt. It's still bothering you, so please help us understand what it is we can do to help you." She finished speaking; the other three guardians nodded their agreement. Jack felt like he was ripped in two. Part of him was so accustomed to being on his own that he just wanted to leave and never come back. But the other part of him, the part that hated the idea of running away to wallow in his own misery, held him there. He wiped the tiny ice chunks from his eyes, and a few more tears ran down and froze on his face. He finally thought he understood. Until now, he had been holding onto his old life, and resisting that someone-four some ones- finally cared what happened to him. He was letting doubt stop him from finally being happy…and that was something he knew he didn't want. He had to accept that this was going to change things. He had to let it go. It was a lot to let go of, 300 years of the same old pain and solitude, but Jack was confident he could do it. He gazed at the four facing him, and finally calmed down. For whatever inexplicable reason, these people cared about him. He couldn't explain this himself, but he was okay with that. Perhaps with time, understanding would come. But he could wait. It was something he had much practice doing.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry I hurt myself, but that was a long time ago, and I thought different things. But it's okay, now. I'll move on. Or, I'll try my best." The burden wasn't going to lift in a second. It would take time, but that was okay. Tooth, North, Sandy, and Bunny knew that they would help. And one day, Jack would never smile to hide his old pain; he would smile because he was truly happy. On that day, all the strife of the past 300 years would finally be resolved. It was a day that the five of them looked forward to.

A/N: I hope you guys like this. It took me forever to write. I know you guys were looking forward to the confrontation scene, and I did my best, so I hope you enjoy it. Also, there should be one more short chapter after this, more of an epilogue. And I might write the time where he gets the scar, instead of just vaguely referencing multiple suicide attempts, depends on what you guys want, so, please review, favorite, and follow, thanks!


	6. Chapter 6

A small smile came across Jack's face. He was sitting in a snow bank, once more inspecting his wrist. The difference today was, however, the skin was blank and smooth. He could clearly see blue veins passing under the unmarked surface. One year. One year had passed since that conversation (or confrontation?) with the guardians. While the memory still made his stomach turn, he was glad that the old scar had faded. After nearly 250 years, it had long out stayed its welcome. Having nothing to hide was a refreshing feeling, and while Jamie would most likely remember the so called 'dinosaur bite' when he was old enough to understand what it truly meant, he felt that he could handle it whenever the time came. He felt for the first time in his long life, that there was truly nothing like the feeling of not having any problems that desperately needed resolving, no nagging at the back of his head. It was a good feeling. While there were still people who died from the cold, he felt he'd grown wiser. People died, and that was a natural part of life. It made him wonder if the guardians were really alive or not, but the passing curiosity it brought was not enough to sour his content mood. He felt that perhaps he was well on his way to understanding more about people than just children. But it was nothing pressing. He could take his time, and spend it having fun with people. And maybe later, maybe even in one thousand years…that was when he could finally find the time to worry about it. Maybe sooner, maybe later, but it was his decision, to be made at his leisure. He was finally free of the burden he'd lived with all his life.

It was this thought which brought the laughter from his lips as the wind pulled him high into the sky, and the thought which made him grin down at the snowy landscape below. This was the beginning of another part of his life. Beginnings are what life is all about.

A/N: Sorry for taking so long…I got distracted for a week…if anyone got that that last sentence is a line from Frank Herbert's God Emperor of Dune, then I love you, and I'm not even kidding. Still not sure if I'm gonna post one more…but if I do, then it's gonna be the scene where Jack gets the scar, so if you guys have any ideas, feel free to tell me!


	7. Chapter 7

Jamie stared at the guardian of fun. Jack stared back, but not in a playful way. Jamie finally understood. Understood what he had seen so long ago. Well, it had only been two years, but it had been nice while it lasted. Jamie looked as if he might cry, and Jack tried desperately to console him. This had all started when a kid in Jamie's school had committed suicide. He hadn't been a friend, but he had been in the boy's class and had been Jamie's first real experience with the subject.

"Then…Jack, you too?" Jack hated to see the sadness, and to know that it was because of him, but he waited a moment before saying anything.

"Ah...yes, Jamie. But it was long before you were ever born." Jamie gave him a disapproving look.

"Do you think that means I don't care?_!_" Jack sighed. He sat perched on his staff in the middle of his first believer's bedroom, the aforementioned boy sitting on his bed.

"Well, what do you want me to say about it? It's not like it could have killed me. That's how it is. Remember?"

"I want you to say you never will! What if _everyone _commits suicide now? You, Jonathan..." Jack leapt down and crossed the room, and tried to pat the twelve year old on the shoulder. Tears crept into the child's eyes, for he still was a child. Two years had not changed this, and neither had his newfound knowledge on people.

"Jamie, everyone won't commit suicide, I promise." How could everyone do that? Jamie knew tons of people, after all. They couldn't all die. "Besides, you'll stop believing in me, and it will be like I was never alive, anyway." Woops. That was the wrong thing to say. Jamie stood up, angry at the statement.

"No, it won't! I won't stop believing in you, and even if I do, that doesn't mean you never existed!" He yelled as though his life depended on it, before losing his force, and he sat back down, deflated. "How can you even say that, Jack? I thought you knew that I would always believe in you…"

"I'm sorry. I know you will." _At least, hopefully for a while longer. _But he did not voice these thoughts, instead sitting down next to Jamie, and promising him that he wouldn't ever die and leave him, and that he wouldn't try and commit suicide again. Which Jack found a little redundant, but he knew that it was necessary to comfort him, and that this day had been long in coming. He was almost surprised when he found that frozen tears had made their way into his eyes, as well.

"Jack, do people…cut themselves?" Jack frowned, but knew that it was best to be honest. It was only natural that the news came to the boy after the suicide, after all.

"Yes. Some people do." He swallowed, uncomfortable with the part of the role model. "But I want you to never do it, okay?" Jamie looked surprised.

"Of course I wouldn't! But…why do they do that?" Jack sighed, and scraped at the floor with the tip of his staff.

"I don't pretend to understand people, Jamie. But people cut themselves when they are very upset, or they are feeling really bad."

"My mom told me about that. I didn't believe her that people do that, but she said that they do it to get attention." Jack bit his lip, old emotions roiling beneath his skin at the words.

"Maybe that's why, sometimes. But I don't think that's actually why. At least, not anywhere near as often as she seems to think." Jamie seemed satisfied with that answer, and stood up, wiping away the tears that had gathered on his cheeks. Jack followed suit, brushing away the specks of ice that had blocked his vision for the few minutes that they'd sat. "Do you want to go play with your friends?" Jamie nodded, and Jack was grateful. He'd rather never revisit that part of his past again.

A/N: Yay, I finally added something. This is probably the last, unless I get more inspiration. This one was a bit hard for me, because I've been caught cutting before, and it definitely wasn't for attention, but I think it was a good addition to the story.


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